As I sit here tonight, I feel so blessed!
Blessed when I saw my soaking wet boys holding our 2 dogs cause I knew everyone was safe.
Blessed when I saw all the city firefighters doing all they could to save what they could.
Blessed when I saw Keith Warren with extra clothes that night.
Blessed when I saw my brother and helping me jump my truck cause I forgot to take the keys out.
Blessed when Militza’s coworkers came by to check on her.
Blessed when one of the firefighters went in when we couldnt to grab my daughter’s instruments.
Blessed when the Red Cross came and handed us bags with necessities and a card so we could get some dry underwear that night.
Blessed when I put that dry underwear on along with dry clothes given to us earlier.
Blessed that I went to sleep and knew that everything would be allright. Can’t imagine most people would feel that, but my wife and I did.
Blessed when we woke up and got back to the house, there was already a team of people from FBC Crowley and several Crowley Eagle football players ready to get to work.
Blessed to see that there was some stuff salvageable, cause wasn’t sure there would be much the night before.
Blessed when coach Jeromy Flowers called and let me know that everyone was praying and the SCS moms lead by Dawn Holt and Amy Huchingson Taylor were already working to raise support.
Blessed when I found out there was already a go fund me set up by my wife’s good friend Dina for us.
Blessed when my dad who is sick got us masks, gloves, and trash bags to get started.
Blessed when an army of people including city workers started taking clothes to get washed.
Blessed by all the calls, texts, and facebook replies I’ve had over the last 2 days.
Blessed by all the drinks, table and chairs brought to our house for those working during cleanup.
Blessed to see Coach Flowers and his kids, Dawn Holt and one of my D-Line players during the day. Just seeing them lifted my spirits.
Blessed for all who have donated, either thru Go Fund Me or thru cash, checks, gift cards, the number of people who have donated is overwhelming!
Blessed to live in a community where organizations like First Baptist of Crowley, Infuzed Student Ministries, Calvary Baptist of Crowley, Southwest Christian School, Crowley Might Eagle Band, Crowley Football team, Crowley Lions Club, Hildebrant plumbing, The Catch Seafood, Crowley Tire and Auto, City of Crowley, Crowley Public Library, Crowley Rec Center, Crowley fire department have done so much for us already.
Blessed cause I know that so much has been done for us that I havent even been able to post about.
Blessed cause I know that God will direct our paths and deliver a new place to live.
Blessed cause we are loved.
Blessed cause of all of you!
Blessed cause God is our strength!
Just Blessed!
Wilderness
I forgot I wrote this yesterday. I literally did just lose all my possessions to a house fire caused by a lightning strike last night. But I still feel blessed. My family is safe. We only lost things, things can be replaced.
2 hours before church last night, my dad asked me to give the message cause he is sick. I spoke at teen camp last week so he said to use that message. But it didnt feel right. I prayed and God gave me a message on why God has people go thru the wilderness. Since church got canceled the second I finished preparing, I wondered why that was laid on my heart. I now know it was just for me.
My family has been going thru a wilderness here lately. So much of are stuff has been breaking down, only 2 out of 5 cars are running, fridge is on the fritz, washing machine was acting up. And now most of those things are gone.
God has us in this wilderness for a reason. Everyone has them. It is part of the journey. I know we will get thru this. I’m positive what God has on the other side is so much better than we had and what we ever could have imagined.
The Power of Positive
In the fall of 2015, I had been let go from a high paying IT job. It was the 3rd time I had been laid off in 4 years and it was difficult to find work. I was trying to stay positive but that was really tough for me. Over and over, I kept hearing that I was overqualified for most of the jobs in which I was applying. After six months, creditors were constantly calling, vehicles were being repossessed, unemployment was running out, and we were about to lose our home. On top of that, my marriage was still rocky as we were trying to recover from the year before (that is a different story that I cover in a different blog post). But I was determined to get us out of this and put my life back together, I just didn’t know how to do it. I was praying every day for a good paying job so I could get back to the life I was accustomed to. But God wanted so much more for my life than a good paying job, and he revealed that through the Power of Positive Summit of 2016.
Since I could not find work, I qualified for funding to help me get back to college. I had started a degree in Sports and Health Sciences thinking I might get back into coaching. I had coached football and basketball part-time several years earlier and I had really missed it. I was taking a class and was doing a report about energy levels. Searching through the school’s online library, I came across Jon Gordon’s book, The Energy Bus. I had not heard of it and did not really know what it was about. I started reading it and although it didn’t really pertain to my paper, it quickly drew me in. The main character seemed a lot like me! I soon forgot about my paper and I stayed up all night reading this book. In The Energy Bus, Jon talks about fueling your life, work, and team with positive energy. I searched online about Jon Gordon, and I saw that he and Daniel Decker were about to start a Power of Positive Summit online. The best part was, it was free, which happened to be exactly all that I could afford. I signed up, not really sure what to expect. This positive thing was new to me even though I took a course from the Positive Coaching Alliance years earlier when I coached. But honestly, I never really bought into it.
So early April, the summit started. It had some awesome speakers: Yogi Roth, Joshua Medcalf, Andy Andrews. All giving me great messages and showing me what the power of positive mindset was. But one video really hit really stood out for me. Eric Metaxas talked about what being positive was for him. He told the story of the children of Israel crossing over the red sea. After they crossed safely on dry ground, and God delivered them from the Egyptian army, they thanked God and sang a song. Eric pointed out that they should have been thanking God and singing before they crossed! Right Song, wrong side! God had done so much for them already. I still have the quote I sent out on Twitter that night: This really hit home! “Be thankful in ALL circumstances. Trust. Believe.” – @ericmetaxas.
This is where everything really changed for me! I remember watching that video over and over and crying more each time I watched it. I opened my Bible and dived into Exodus and that story. It hit me like a ton of bricks, I saw how blessed I was and even though I was in a tough situation, I should be thankful for ALL that God has done for me. Even the trials! That is the night when I truly gave everything up to God. I let go, I surrendered everything to Him. I soon discovered that God needed to take away all those possessions because they had become a prison for me. He had better plans for me and I couldn’t get there with all that weighing me down.
I believe that Power of Positive Summit back in 2016 was done just for me. I truly believe that. I so needed that message right at that point in my life! This year, I am this summit’s biggest fan. My family and friends think I am a little crazy as much as I talk about it and promote it on social media. But I think there could be that one video that is life changing for them as well. So I will continue to promote it, like and share quotes, and sing its praises as much as I can. I don’t know if Jon Gordon will ever read this, but I want to thank him for putting this summit on. I have read most of his books and I now live my life with a positive mindset. I am getting so much from the videos this year and can’t wait every day to see what is next. If you are reading this and you have not signed up for this year’s summit, you still got time. The videos are usually just 5 to 10 minutes and they have such great content. If you want to learn about this positive movement, please check it out at http://PowerOfPositiveSummit.com, it could change your life like it changed mine!
Love
If I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have… but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends….. So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:2-13
My dad used to say, put your name where ‘love’ is in the above verses. And see if it rings true. For example, James is patient. James is kind, James is not irritable, James does not insist on his way… Etc. Most people that know me, have to snicker when reading that. Especially my wife who knows me best. The irritable one will probably make her fall out of her chair laughing. Thankfully, that is changing. Not because of me, but because of God’s love. It is a game changer. He didn’t just start loving me, He has loved me my whole life, before I was even born. But I have only come to realize that love over the past couple of years. And that all started because of my wonderful, beautiful wife who did not give up on loving me.
Besides being Valentine’s day, this weekend is my wife and I’s 22nd wedding anniversary. I have wrote before what she has had to endure for our marriage. She was able to endure because she loved me. And I am soooooo thankful for that love! I know she was able to because she had hope. Not hope in me, but hope in God. She also prayed for me and had faith that God would answer her prayers and open my heart to see God’s love. So, she had faith, hope, and love! But as the Bible says, the greatest is love!
I want to tell my wife that I love her, and thank her for continuing to love me thru everything. Without her love, I probably wouldn’t have recognized God’s love for me, yet. I don’t even like to think about where I’d be if she had not fought for me. I also want to thank God for giving me another chance. Another chance to love my wife and family the right way.
Love is a word that gets thrown around a lot. We love pizza, our sports teams, cars, and many other things that we enjoy. I imagine the word love will be used a billion times today, in cards, commercials, songs, and Instagram posts. But I want you to think about true love. True love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. It is not just something we say or write, it is something we do. Jesus said the greatest commandment is to love the Lord with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. When we truly do that, love flows out of us. We are able to love those around us more deeply cause of that love. That is how my wife was able to love me when most would have said I was unlovable. She loved me even though I didn’t deserve it. Just like God loves us even though we do not deserve it. It is easy to say you love someone when things are going great. True love is to love when things are not. Love endures all, Love never ends!
Commit
I believe if you are going to be successful in anything, you must first make a commitment. It is the first step. No matter what it is, it must start with true commitment! It can not be lip service! A wise coach once told me, that being committed is like being pregnant. You either are, or you are not. There is no in between. You can not be “kinda” pregnant. It is the same with being committed, you either are, or you are not.
We are in the second month of 2018. Time flies, right? I want you to think about all those New Year resolutions or goals you made at the start of the year. It is easy to talk about changing then. There are so many Nike or Apple commercials that motivate and get you fired up. So, are you still working on them? If not, then I’m afraid you did not really commit. I love this quote from Inky Johnson, he says “Commitment is staying true to what you said you would do long after the mood you said it in has left.” You probably had good intentions. I am sure you were motivated. I am sure you were inspired, but you were not committed.
The high school football team I coach for, has a commitment night before the season starts. It is an awesome night! We gather in a room and one by one, coaches and players go up to the front. We put our hand on a team helmet, and commit to the team. It is powerful stuff. We laugh, we cry, we draw closer to one another. And as the season progresses, we remind everyone about the commitment they made to their brothers. It makes a big difference through the season. I believe this works because each player has made themselves accountable to the team. It is a good practice for yourself. Make yourself accountable to either a friend, family, or even a coach. We all have bad days, we all have those moments when we want to quit. You need that accountability. That is why getting a life coach, or mentor in your life is so beneficial.
Usually, when there is lasting change, most people can remember a time when they made a commitment. A commitment to themselves, friends, family or God. That moment when they said enough was enough, when they said: I have to change, or I have to quit drinking, I have to lose weight, I have to quit smoking, I have to start being there for my family, I have to give my life to God. Whatever it is, whatever you need to do, start with committing. Write it down, then tell someone about it. Then live up to your commitments. The most successful people I know do what they say they were going to do when they say they are going to do it. Improving is a process, and the first step of that process is to commit!
Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established – Proverbs 16:3
Next Play
As a coach, I am always reminding players to focus on the next play. It is easy to say, harder to do. What separates the elite athletes from most, is they are able to put the past behind them. They focus on whats next. We call it having a short memory. Too many times, athletes can not do that. They do not let it go. They keep recalling that horrible play over and over in their head. They keep reliving it, which causes them to make more bad plays. It just snowballs.
Recently, Dez Bryant of the Dallas Cowboys had this happen to him. In a game they had to win, he dropped a simple pass, then he fumbled the ball. This lead him to sitting on the sideline with a defeated look for the remainder of the game. I do not mean to just pick on Dez, I know sports radio has done enough of that over the past few weeks. I just wanted to point out that even professional athletes do it, not just the high school athletes I coach.
But it is not just athletes, we do it in this game of life as well. Think about when you had a bad day, which turned into a bad week, a bad month, etc.. Or one bad decision that lead into another bad decision, then another, till you find yourself at rock bottom. Wondering how in the world did you sink so low. How did it get to this.
In sports, coaches stress fundamentals. If the player does what they are suppose to do, they have a better chance of making a positive play. When they get away from those techniques that they were taught, negative things usually happen. It is the same for us. I believe most of us know the fundamentals on how we should live our lives. We just do not execute like we should. We do not stop the negative momentum from building up. We need to pause and tell ourselves – Next Play. We can not change the past, there is nothing we can do about yesterday. We can only control the controllable’s. So as we learn from yesterday, let us make sure we focus on today. Not tomorrow. Just today! Focus on just this next play.
Possess it!
New Year’s resolutions do not work for 9 out of ten people. It is amazing that so many people do it, even with a very low success rate. We are a week into the new year, are you still keeping yours? I personally gave up making them a couple of years ago. I also gave up making goals, but that is another post. Instead of resolutions, I now do the One Word campaign. It’s very simple, pick out One Word that can help guide your decisions or actions for this year. You can use it to help focus your life. The right word can guide you to lasting change.
I also like to tie my One Word to a verse for the year. At my church, we get to stand and tell everyone our year’s verse. Two years ago, my word was Courageous and my verse was Joshua 1:9 – “Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid…for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” It was helpful for me with all that I was facing. I made numerous life changing decisions that year, and with each decision, I asked myself, is this Courageous? I wanted to stop making decisions based on fear, that is what I had been doing my whole life. Then last year, my word was Forward; my verse was Exodus 14:13-15. I blogged about that experience with God telling me He had everything under control, I just needed to keep moving. I just needed to Go Forward!
I have been thinking about 2018’s word for a couple of weeks now. My previous words were from Israel’s journey from their captivity to their promised land. I felt I was supposed to stay with this theme again. I know I haven’t fully reached my promised land. I am out of the captivity I was in, but I know I haven’t fully arrived yet. I am not where God wants me to end up. But for the first time, I can see the plan that God has for me. And honestly, it is overwhelming, exciting, and scary at the same time. I am sure that is what the children of Israel felt when they were on the border of the promise land. God told them to “Possess the land” but they refused the first time. Because of that, they journeyed through the wilderness. God gave them their inheritance, their land, but they refused to possess it. They saw all the difficulties, hardships, troubles, and obstacles that laid before them. They did not have the faith that God had already gave them the land, they just needed to possess it!
So, as you can tell, my word for 2018 is Possess. My verse is Deuteronomy 1:21 – ‘Look, the Lord your God has set the land before you; go up and possess it, as the Lord God of your fathers has spoken to you; do not fear or be discouraged.’ I realize that it is an unusual verse to have for the year. I am sure that I will be the only one to use this verse. But it has everything in it to help me. It is telling me that God has set everything up for me, but I need to possess it! That does not mean it will be easy. Obstacles will surely come up. But as I have found out the last couple of years, the obstacle is the way. The verse then tells me as ‘God has spoken to me’. I believe he has given me a vision, I must continue to act on that vision. Then the last part, do not fear or be discouraged. This theme is in all my yearly verses. Fear kept me from reaching my full potential earlier in my life. I did not have the faith to overcome all those fears. So, as 2018 starts, I know I am at the border. I can choose to wait, and maybe have to wander the wilderness cause of my fear. Or I can be courageous, move forward and possess all that God is giving me!
The Greatest Teacher, Failure is!
What a great line from Yoda in The Last Jedi. I hope it is not too much of a spoiler for you, that Yoda made an appearance in the latest Star Wars movie. I immediately wanted to use it right after it ended, but my kids said I needed to wait till after the weekend. And I am glad I did because I kept hearing this message about failure over and over. It is like I was supposed to get this engrained in my head.
One of these instances was Charlie Day from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. One of my older sons love that show. He was watching a commencement speech given by Charlie and told me I needed to watch it. I sat down with him mainly cause I was curious. How could a guy who played one of the dumbest guys on TV, be asked to give a commencement speech? But it was a really great speech (and funny) that encouraged the graduates not to do the safe thing, but take risks. He said “Be willing to fail, let yourself fail, fail in the way and the place you would want to fail. Fail, pick yourself up, and fail again. Because without your struggle, what is your success anyways.” That is a great point, what is success without struggle. If it always came easy, it would get boring.
I don’t know about you, but I love hearing about successful failures. People who overcame their past failures, learned from them, and became successful. JK Rowling, Steve Jobs, Abraham Lincoln, Bill Gates, Albert Einstein, Walt Disney and Michael Jordan are just some of the most famous ones. They all overcame failures, obstacles, and setbacks to become some of the greatest at their profession. But a key part of their failure is, they learned something along the way. When you fail, make sure you learn from it! Failing isn’t fun. I would much rather succeed. But no one makes every shot, nobody bats a thousand. But it is hard to win if you aren’t swinging or shooting. So, don’t be afraid to fail! Its the greatest teacher. A Jedi Master said so!
Read to Lead – Books I read in 2017
I went most of my life trying to read as little as possible. It was not till recently, that I discovered the greatness of reading. These books are all that I have read this past year. A few of them are books that I have read before, but I felt I needed to read them again. One of the books I reread was The Energy Bus by Jon Gordon. This book actually started the journey I’m on that turned my life around. The main character, George, could have been written about me. Everything in his life was falling apart: his career, marriage, family, health. He lived a fearful life, always expecting something bad to happen to him. And when you live and think like that, you will make it a self fulfilling prophecy. I actually try to read the Energy Bus at least once a year. It reminds me where I was, and I do not want to go back.
Most of the books that I read, are on the Leadership Reading Challenge from Train to be Clutch. Their work has really been instrumental in me finding my focus. Joshua Medcalf, the founder of T2BC wrote a book earlier this year titled: Pound the Stone. I was lucky enough to be on the book launch team, so I got to read a couple of the advance versions. I loved the final version and would have to say that it was the best book I read all year.
Next, would be the Power of Positive Leadership by Jon Gordon. I was on that book launch team as well. This book really challenged me as I got ready to coach football this past season. I wanted to be the most positive coach I could be after reading it. It taught me I need to be committed to my players and that I should find and live my purpose.
The last book that I would like to briefly recommend is – In a pit with a lion on a snowy day. This is another book that I reread. Whenever I feel fearful of something coming up, I read this book. It reminds me to trust God completely. He is bigger than any lions in your life.
So, here is the list of books I had the privilege of reading this year:
Pound the Stone – Joshua Medcalf
Power of Positive Leadership – Jon Gordon
In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day – Mark Batterson
The Energy Bus – Jon Gordon
The Carpenter – Jon Gordon
The Barbarian Way – Erwin McManus
The 21 Most Powerful Minutes in a Leader’s Day – John C. Maxwell
The Principle Circle – Jamie Gilbert
The War of Art – Steven Pressfield
The One Thing – Gary Keller
The 5 Second Rule – Mel Robbins
Become a Life Coach – Mitch Matthews
Christian Coaching – Gary Collins
It’s only thirteen books. I really want to read twice that many in 2018!
2 Different Men
As I took the selfie with my wife, I remembered doing the exact same thing, in that same spot, right there with my wife 3 years ago. The man in those pics is physically the same, but mentally, emotionally, spiritually….so different. The man from 3 years ago, was a broken man. A man who had a huge void in his life, and was trying to fill it anyway he could. That man was fearful for the future, had lost all faith, and was negative about everything. He hated life. Everything and just about everyone had become a burden to him. He couldn’t enjoy all the blessings he had, because they all felt like weights or a prison. A prison that he could not break free from. His nice house – a prison, his nice cars – just big weights. He even felt his wonderful, beautiful family was somehow holding him back.
He was ready to throw it all away to seek happiness. He would not of found it. He would still be searching if it wasn’t for his wonderful wife who fought so hard for him. Honestly, it is hard to believe that she is in either of those pics. Most women would not be. Most women would have left as fast as they could. But she fought. She didn’t want to at first. But God was speaking to her, telling her not to give up on me. Telling her that one day, our marriage would be beautiful and an example of the way marriages should be.
I remember her telling me that. I could not understand it then. I still don’t really know how that man in the first pic became to be the man in the second. I don’t really know how that man, who had given up on life and hated waking up and facing the day became the man who wakes up feeling more blessed each day. Blessed that he has a wife who fought for him! Blessed that he got to spend and enjoy these past three years with his family. Blessed that he gets to coach young athletes and blessed that God has called him to help men that were in his situation.
My wife recently wrote a little about her experience. It’s the post titled Bitter. I encourage everyone to read it. God has given us both a vision. And we have both taken big steps towards that vision. A life without purpose is no life at all. God wants us to be happy. Happy in life and in our marriages. The man and wife in the second pic is proof that it can happen NO MATTER WHAT HAS HAPPENED PREVIOUSLY!
Metz Coaching 